Some Facts on Grandparents Raising Grandchildren
In the United States, slightly more than 7 million grandparents lived with at least one grandchild under age 18 in the same household during 2010. One in 10 American children (a total of 7.5 million children) was living in a household with at least one grandparent.
Such family settings may range from multiple generations sharing a home together to a widowed grandmother raising a granddaughter. In particular, however, 2.7 million grandparents carried the primary responsibility of caring for their grandchildren and meeting their basic needs, representing nearly 40 percent of grandparents who reside with a grandchild (data from U.S. Census, 2010).
These families headed by a grandparent often are called “grandfamilies,” and they are common among families in which a relative has taken over primary responsibility for raising a child from parents (known as “kinship care”). Relative caregivers, such as grandparents, are adult relatives in a family who have taken on the primary role of providing care and guidance for a related child who is age 18 or younger.
Potential Reasons a Child is Cared for by a Grandparent
The reasons a grandparent may provide needed care for a grandchild vary and can include:
- Parent has an addiction or difficulties with alcohol or drugs
- Parent has mental health challenges or emotional problems
- Child neglect, abandonment or abuse
- Parent is in jail
- Youth or inexperience of parents (teen pregnancy, etc.)
- Physical health issues or death of parent
- Unstable home life, homelessness
- Lack of financial resources, lack of general ability
- Domestic violence in the home, divorce, other family challenges
- Military deployment
Grandparenting Scenarios
List two or three thoughts and feelings that you think would be common for a grandparent in each of these different grandparenting scenarios.
Scenario One – A grandmother receives a phone call from the hospital. Her first grandchild, a granddaughter, has been born to a son and his wife. She gets ready to travel to visit the grandchild and family. What are her thoughts and feelings?
• (Example) I am excited to hold a newborn grandchild for the first time.
Scenario Two – A grandmother receives a phone call from a social worker. Her oldest grandchild, 11 years old, is in need of care. The child’s parents are divorced; her father is incarcerated in another state, and her mother has been arrested on drug charges. The social worker wants to visit about providing kinship care. The grandmother gets ready to visit with the social worker and get her home ready for the grandchild. What are her thoughts and feelings?
• (Example) Where is my grandchild’s school? What time does it start?
Can I do this?
Raising a Child as a Grandparent
Clearly, grandparents often are very influential in the lives of grandchildren, whether they provide occasional care, live close by or are far away. But what happens when grandparents assume the role of parent for their grandchildren? Becoming a parent to a grandchild means taking on an important new role in life. Several important factors can include:
Attitude adjustment – Grandparents usually anticipate later life as a time to enjoy the privileges of grandchildren without many responsibilities. Adjusting to the new role of primary caregiver typically takes some effort. Also, it may mean many adjustments in life planning, from finances to career changes to location and lifestyle changes.
Mixed feelings – Most adults enjoy being grandparents and associating with grandchildren. However, taking on the role of raising a grandchild can bring mixed feelings because grandparents feel increased anxiety and pressure while also appreciating closeness to a grandchild.
Sense of purpose – Grandparents involved in raising grandchildren often report a greater sense of purpose in their own lives. While the change may not be expected, most grandparents raising grandchildren describe a greater sense of purpose in life because of their caretaking responsibility.
Heightened stress – Raising children brings with it common stresses, from meeting basic needs to making sure homework gets done. Often, grandparents raising a grandchild experience significantly more stress than other caregivers due to such things as financial concerns, physical limitations or adjusting to transitions. Grandparents in this role need support in caring for their own physical and emotional health.
Need for support – The support needs of grandparents raising grandchildren often increase. Providing for education costs, medical needs of children, discipline and guidance, and other tasks require support and encouragement from others.
Varied Roles as a Grandparent
Research with grandparents who are “providing regular care” to grandchildren shows a variety of roles. Eleven percent of grandparents responsible for grandchildren have done so for less than six months, about 10 percent have done so for six to 11 months, a quarter (23.5 percent) for one or two years, 17 percent for three or four years, and nearly 40 percent for five years or more. Three common roles identified for grandparents providing care to grandchildren are:
Day-care grandparents, who provide regular daily care for an extended period
“Living-with” grandparents, who reside with a grandchild but do not have legal custody (usually the grandchild lives in the grandparent’s home)
Custodial grandparents, who have obtained legal responsibility for the grandchild
Grandparents more often provide regular care for a daughter’s child than a son’s, especially in the custodial situation. Day-care grandparents usually care for very young children, while other grandparents care for children up through the late teenage years.
All three groups reported that rearing young children affected their lifestyle, friendships, family and marriage. Nearly three-fourths of all the grandparents reported major adjustments in their routines and plans, with custodial grandparents reporting the most change.
Despite challenges, most grandparents raising grandchildren are very committed to providing care and finding the resources needed to give children a loving, safe environment.
Grandparents Giving Support to Grandchildren
The demands placed on grandparents providing regular care to grandchildren can vary widely. Economic hardship in the U.S. and recent social challenges have contributed to the increase in multiple-family generations living together to save costs and share resources.
For day-care grandparents, assistance usually is given to offset economic difficulties and provide support for working parents. Parents with full-time work schedules may depend heavily on grandparents to provide needed supervision and care. Parent illness, divorce, teen parenthood or simply a desire to help adult children and grandchildren all can be motivating reasons for a grandparent’s assistance in such circumstances.
“Living-with” grandparents also are quite common, with multiple generations living together in a single household. In this situation, grandparents most often are providing help with financial difficulties and working to provide basic needs and save economic resources. An adult child may have lost a job, experienced a costly divorce or been reduced to part-time work, and, therefore, the family members live together to meet economic or other needs.
“Living-with” grandparents, however, more often are in a position in which they simply begin to take over responsibilities for raising a child. In some cases, this pattern may develop because the child’s mother has not yet left home.
In this circumstance, the grandparents do not have legal authority over the grandchild, but often “living-with” grandparents prefer such an informal arrangement. Obtaining legal custody sometimes can involve declaring one’s own adult child an unfit parent, which takes an emotional as well as financial toll.
Custodial grandparents who are providing primary care and have legal responsibility for a child often become involved due to significant stresses, such as a parent’s mental or emotional health concerns, physical illness or death, substance abuse difficulties or parental incarceration. These grandparents play an important role in caring for children, with their own unique needs and strengths, and they also benefit from specific support as a family unit.
Most of the time, grandparents in this situation did not plan to assume care of a grandchild (some of whom have their own frustrations and challenges) at a time when they are experiencing the processes associated with growing older.
Support Needs for Grandparents Raising Grandchildren
Regardless of a caregiver’s age, race or ethnicity, gender, living situation or economic status, all grandparents raising a child and other relative caregivers share a common need: the need for education and support. They need to understand the specific issues surrounding their situation, knowledge of best parenting and guidance practices, and support to provide the care a child needs.
Grandparents raising grandchildren can benefit from extra support and encouragement other family members provide. In addition, they may benefit from connecting to available social service agencies and support organizations in their region.
A variety of support options are available. Some health-care and nonprofit organizations (such as the statewide Parent Education Network in North Dakota) offer grandparenting classes to address the changing roles of grandparents. Other options might include caregiver support groups and resources from organizations focused on serving families and seniors. Call around in your community and contact your local county or regional Extension office to see what is available.
Support for adults providing kinship care to a child can address many needs, such as:
- Assistance in establishing legal guardianship, if needed
- Financial assistance through welfare (Temporary Assistance to Needy Families), Medicaid, etc.
- Assistance with housing or energy costs
- Setting up educational funds and assistance with school enrollment
- Respite care and other services for care providers
- Counseling or other assistance for children who have experienced trauma
- Education on caregiver support efforts and programs
Eligibility for some kinds of assistance may be dependent on the grandparent’s legal relationship to and responsibility for the child, which is covered in greater detail in the Extension publication “The Rights of Grandparents in Raising Grandchildren.”
Support groups and services for grandparents raising grandchildren also are springing up around the country. Caregiver support groups can provide discussion and support networks, linkage with specific resources and association with community partners.
References
Casper, L.M., and Bryson, K.R. (1998). Co-resident grandparents and their grandchildren: Grandparent-maintained families. Population Division Working Paper No. 26. Washington, D.C.: Population Division, U.S. Bureau of the Census.
Geen, R. (2004). The evolution of kinship care policy and practice. The Future of Children, 14(1), 131-149.
Gleeson, J.P., Hsieh, C., Anderson, N., Seryak, C., Wesley, J., Choi, E.H., et al. (2008.) Individual and social protective factors for children in informal kinship care. Executive Summary. University of Illinois at Chicago, Jane Adams College of Social Work and the Grand Boulevard Federation. Retrieved April 5, 2009.
Jendrek, M.P. (1994). Grandparents who parent their grandchildren: Circumstances and decisions. Gerontologist, 34, 206-216.
Murphey, D., Cooper, M., and Moore, K.A. (2012). Grandparents living with children: State-level data from the American Community Survey. Child Trends Research Brief, Publication #2012-30. Washington, D.C.: Child Trends. Retrieved Jan. 23, 2013,
Population Reference Bureau. (2011). The health and well-being of grandparents caring for grandchildren. Today’s Research on Aging: Program and Policy Implications, 23, 1-6.
U.S. Census Bureau, American Community Survey. (2010). Tables B05003, B10051, B10051B, B10052, B10053, B10054, B10056, B10057, B10058, B10059, B10061, and B16005, on Jan. 23, 2013.
For more in The Art of Grandparenting series.
April 2013
https://www.ag.ndsu.edu/publications/home-farm/when-grandparents-become-parents-to-their-grandchildren#section-1
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